Writer Mindfulness 101: Taming Thought Monsters by Kerry Schafer

'Tis a plight common to us all.

It doesn't matter where you're at in the writing game. Whether you're an oft published traditional author, a successful indy writer, a novice, a dabbler, a writer under contract, or a hopeful querier - at some point your brain is going to create a Thought Monster.

These beasties come in as many different sizes, shapes, and colors as there are brains to spawn them. You can recognize them by their vocalization patterns, which are repetitive, negative, and have the staying power of an Energizer Bunny dunked in the Fountain of Youth. In case you still don't recognize the beast, here is a representative selection of the things they've been heard to say:

This story totally sucks, but then all your writing sucks. Also? You are worthless as a human.

You call yourself a writer? Bwahahahaha. Did you hear that? She called herself a writer. Priceless.

Agents have a secret campfire club where they make S'Mores and crack jokes about your manuscript. A new kind of roast.

Your editor got your revisions and took to drinking. Maybe you'll hear from him when he gets out of rehab.

You haven't got enough talent to write a shopping list. A novel? What were you thinking? Are you insane?

Do you realize people are going to READ this?

These are the voices of the common, garden variety Thought Monster. There's another, more insidious strain. These are deceptively beautiful at first glance - sparkly and rainbow bright - but rotten at the core and potentially even more dangerous. Their voices sound more like this:

Revise? Are you serious? I know it's a first draft but it's brilliant. Querying now!

Wow. All of my beta readers are idiots and totally missing the point.

Ooh, look! It's a shiny self pub button!! Can't wait for an editor or a cover designer. Must push button NOW!!

Most of us have an infestation of one strain or the other. Me? I can be infected by both at the same time. It matters not that the slogans they shout at me are logically incompatible - like Alice, there have been days where I've believed six impossible things before breakfast.

So what's a writer to do?

Well, I've been trying to apply some simple principles of mindfulness to the problem, with at least enough success that I haven't yet lost all sanity. On the off chance that some of you are also fending off the Thought Monsters, I've included a couple of suggestions to try to help tame the evil beasts.

Free Writing - Identifying the Monster

The key to this technique is in the free writing.  For me, this process works best with pen and a notebook, but other people swear by their keyboards. I also think that first thing in the morning is the best time for this, as you're still on the edge of sleep and closer to what might be floating around in your subconscious. But the only real rule is that you must let the words flow directly from your brain onto the page without stopping to analyze or monitor. Write fast, write dirty. Spelling, punctuation, grammar - all of that stuff doesn't count here. It's all about spilling words as fast as possible onto the page. What does this have to do with taming Thought Monsters? Think of it like one of those hidden wildlife cameras on National Geographic. The Thought Monster will show up on the page when he thinks you're not looking. If you can get a good look at him, then you have a better idea exactly what it is you're dealing with.

Remember Thoughts are Not Facts - Disengaging from the Monster

We are sometimes tempted to let our thoughts have a life of their own, to believe that they are somehow solid, independent FACTS, just because they happened to drift through our heads. Thank all of the powers of good that this is not the case. A thought is just a thought until we turn it into action of some kind. And the thing about the Thought Monsters is that we don't want to give them any more life than what they've already taken for themselves.

One of the principles of mindfulness is to become aware of your thoughts, and then to just observe them without attaching any judgment. This is tricky. We're very quick to label all of our thoughts (and emotions) as good or bad. It takes some practice.

You Might Try This:

If you're already a pro at mindfulness or meditation, just go do that. If not, this is an exercise to get you started. Set aside five minutes of quiet, distraction free time. Get comfortable. For many people it's helpful to close the eyes. Begin with three slow, deep breaths, paying attention to the way your body feels as the air enters and exits your lungs. If you fall asleep at this point, take the nap. You obviously need it. If you're still awake, allow yourself to notice whatever thoughts are in your head. The goal is to observe them, as though you are bird watching or looking at fish in an aquarium. We are not hunting here; please don't try to capture or slay any of your thoughts. We are just observing them in their natural habitat. If you find yourself judging or holding onto a thought, just notice that you are doing that, let it go, and observe the next thought.Continue for five minutes or so. Take three deep breaths, open your eyes, and get back to work.

And inevitably somebody asks, "what's the point?"

Several things are accomplished by this one little mindfulness activity. For one, it's a great management tool for anxiety. For another, regular practice can lead to an increased ability to focus and concentrate. But for our Monster taming purposes, what this does is allow you to detach from the thought, to see it as something separate from your self. When you see a thought such as "I'm a horrible writer and I'll never succeed at anything" swimming around with other thoughts like "I wonder what Oprah eats for breakfast" and "I think I saw a cereal crumb on the counter a minute ago" and "is my penguin t-shirt clean or in the laundry?" it robs it of some of its power.

Living With the Beast

Maybe somebody else knows how to banish Thought Monsters from your life forever. Maybe there's an exorcism ritual or a Thought Monster Exterminator Kit. If such a thing exists, I don't know it. Sometimes the creatures will lie low for awhile, only to pop up making scary faces when I least want their company. In a way, they remind me of the garden gnomes in the Harry Potter stories. No matter how many times you fling them over the fence they will find their way back. So I've settled for learning how to co-exist with the creatures.

One of the most effective strategies I know is to just acknowledge their presence and then get busy. To say - Hey - I recognize you! You've been visiting now for what - twenty years now? Persistence Points for you, buddy. Carry on. I'll be over at my desk. Writing.